HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Despite a very bitter divorce that has been played out in the media, Kate Gosselin is still holding onto some fond memories of her time with estranged husband Jon.
"A part of me always will [love Jon]," the 34-year-old mother of eight told the Today show's Natalie Morales in a TLC interview special that aired Monday night. "It's hard to to be married to somebody for 10 years and try to say, 'No, I don't love them anymore.' It doesn't work really well. I love the memories that we have together."
"We can't turn life off," she adds. "You're viewing our lives; yes, you can turn it off. I can't turn life off. In the last nine, 10 months, it's gotten real crazy, and I can't seem to get away from it. I just want peace for my kids."
Kate also told Morales that she regrets belittling her husband in front of the Jon and Kate Plus 8 camera crew.
"I was very hard on him and I would never deny that," she said. "I felt very much like a lot of weight rested on my shoulders."
"I was wrong to treat him that way," added Kate. "Was it good, healthy and wonderful? No. Am I proud of those moments that were captured? No."
With tears in her eyes, Kate said there are still times when she wonders if the man she fell in love with still exists.
Said Kate: "I still wake up every day and I think the phone will ring and it'll be ... the old Jon."
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